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Buy this book and hold it close, it may change your life. All his work is well worth the investment. John Gottman produces the most insightful and inspiring books I have ever read. Every parent should own a copy of this book and refer to it on a regular basis. Other books that you may find helpful are: Kids-Parents and Power Struggles, How To Talk So Kids Can Listen, Got the Baby Where's the Manual, Between Parent and Child,and Undconditional Parenting.Kimberley Clayton Blaine, MA, MFTLicensed Child TherapistAuthor, Mommy Confidencefounder, www.TheGoToMom.TV There would be less violence, suicide, depression and school drop out if children where raised by parents who had more empathy and understanding of the important role that emotions play in early childhood.
It's a great read. That's How the Light Gets In: Memoir of a Psychiatrist by Susan Rako, M.D. memoir written by a brilliant woman trained in child psychiatry, whose path was influenced by a need to heal the damages of her own childhood. owes its title to a song by Leonard Cohen: "There is a crack, a crack in everything. The writing just flows. That's how the light gets in." Rako's book is remarkably candid, fascinating, and wonderfully well-written.
Great book. One of the best parenting books out there. A must read for every parent.
This is not a bunch of pop psychology. I know about John Gottman and his reputation as an excellent researcher on emotions and how they play out in body language and other ways people communicate with one another. This book was a purchase as a gift to my daughter who brought our first grandchild into the world not long ago. I am also very familiar with the research on Emotional Intelligence developed by Perter Salovey at Yale and popularized by Daniel Goleman. It is impotant information from a man who knows whereof he speaks. This book integrates all of those sources of profoundly important social science into an amalgam that will surely help parents guide their children toward becoming well balanced and confident.
It's short and easy to read, and most readers probably come away wishing their parents had read it. These real-life examples colorfully reinforce Gottman's basic theories and demonstrate the advice in action. Half way through the book, I found myself already trying to apply its principles in dealing with emotional outbreaks from our young children. As with Seven Principles, Raising an Emotionally Intelligent Child is a tad heavy on discussions of research methodology, obviously intended to enhance the credibility of Gottman's conclusions. They responded well. Concepts are supported by examples of good and bad parental attitudes and/or parent-child interactions. John Gottman is a professor of psychology at the University of Washington, a Rabbi, author of the excellent book, "The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work," and also an entertaining speaker.
Against that backdrop, it wasn't difficult for my wife to get me to read "Raising an Emotionally Intelligent Child" after we had our second kid, although I wondered what misdeed on my part prompted the purchase. And some of Gottman's advice is a bit much for any but the most obsessive-compulsive. My wife and I attended one of his talks on successful marriages. Gottman presents compelling evidence that parents can play an important role in the emotional well-being and happiness of their children and he argues persuasively that parents who succeed in doing so likely form stronger bonds with their children. He's the Jerry Seinfeld of the clinical psychologist-Rabbi set. As an example, I don't think I'll be keeping an "emotion log" anytime soon in order to better understand my feelings "from moment to moment." Such quirks aside, I recommend this book to every parent. That's a lot more value than one usually expects from a $13, 200-page paperback.
Gottman provides compelling insights and guidance for parents on how to help children identify, understand and work with all kinds of emotions ("emotion coaching").
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